my favourite things..

i think my emailed top fives of the year should, matt-like, also be recorded here..for prosperity's sake...or something...
ok, my top five moments, memories and well, favourite things of the year that was 2005..just as its about to end..

1...edinburgh on july 2nd, the white bands, the silent marching, the shame of finding oneself on said silent march holding a starbucks frappucino and wondering if the police themselves might turn on me for my traitorship to the cause..hanging out in the big dress, and winding up at the cottage..good times..
2...the cold of this winter...i am loving loving loving the cold. my purpose-made, ridiculously long scarf is doing me proud.
3...the first manchester family holiday in wales, in may, at the house with the scary lady, the barbeques, the beers, the "blast-furnace"(sal, 05/05) tans we earned, bh monday lunch, gettinglost EVERYTIME i tried to find my room, praying for the teachers, the drive there with sal, the drive home with russell, and especially tom's now much-used idea of "see you monday", watching garden state with our duvets, singing on the last morning to mrs p's legendary "let my people go" with more five-syllable words than even ric could get into song lyrics..with fin playing the drum..and emma with her purple ribbons..! all good..
4..my shire summer...lazy afternoons and evenings of heading straight from work to the lovely cafe rene, assured of company, cold beer, sunshine, crosswords and laughs...haven't had the early and best part of summer in the glos since i was 18 and hated the place, so it was a whole new time..
5..learning that loving means something like..being nicer to people than they are to you and not waiting to be liked before i like first.or something similar but with more order. or not...in fact, also learning that love isn't patterned or formluable, but earthy and vital, springy and terribly hard work sometimes. i think it laughs though: that satisfied, at-ease laugh that you only really let out when you're shot of fear. am enjoying seeing it at work in me and in my life and knowing its all straight from jesus and that he'll never run out, so neither will i....wowzers! how amazing is that!!
cheating
..6...claire and george's wedding..never did a girl look so at home inher wedding dress, or a boy look so unashamedly but quietly inlove..the rest of us had big fun on the bridge too..

it really was a good year. nothing spectacular, and not all that much real excitement or change. but god did say at its beginning that i was about to be divested of all my dreams. i can honestly say that it has taken him more or less the full twelve-month to accmmplish that. so now i have none. not a one. except of more snow.....

sitting on the toolbox..

so i am a fan of the jcb song..
i spent the last 24 hours out and about in the countryside of ours and a neighbouring shire..i saw tractors, watched a cat fight with a crazy fox, heard the rooster crow in the wee small hours as we were outside still drinking wine, playing in the snow and sneaking cigarettes..we practised our shire accents (owl: one syllable or two...?!), watched the chickens and listened to the quiet..
i do like it round here..
went out tonight for a bit of a warm-up beverage with my accomplices for tomorrow night.we've placed our bets on who may be found first crying in a corner somewhere, who might get up to no good, and have fully-laid plans for where to proceed to after crackers..
whochester? can't hear ya...

lola..

is my favourite kinks song..
the music-history syllabus is coming along nicely, although i am struggling to see how i can let the 80's in on the act..as ever..this really means that i am struggling to find the ways in which 80's music had an impact or influence on any subsequent music...surely, surely it was just a phase that ended as abruptly as it had begun, and was best quickly forgotten!? surely it was the mid-life crisis in the life of rock music..? surely its welcome termination was evidenced by the warmth with which the world received happy hardcore and take that, in the very early 90''s...?! we were all so tired of the bizarre and exhausting combination of melancholic drama and the intense "we must have fun, even if it kills us" attitude of the hideous 80's, that we had arms wide open waiting for something shit to appear, just so that so we could move on...i mean really, and i know this following quote has been used in part on this blog at least once before, but the 80's even proved the undoing of musicians that were once great...mighty, even...and jack black's barry in high fideilty once more find the words for me, as he asks...
"Top 5 musical crimes perpetutated by Stevie Wonder in the 80s and 90s? Go .... is it in fact fair to criticize a formerly great artist for his latter day sins? Is it better to burn out ... or fade away?"
some people should have just slept through the 80's and then they might have been alright. elton john: rocket man, tiny dancer, saturday night's alright...etc etc...then he hits the 80's..nightmare....
aretha franklin: oh my god.........all i need to get by, respect, think........pure anthems of the once-caged bird....and then......duets with george michael and something about who is zooming who.....
who let it happen?!
in fact, duets in general were an ongoing crime of the whole decade..janet jackson and cliff richard....!! please.
...so if anyone has any sensible suggestions that may help me fill an entire decade's worth of musical education, that won't wound my ears in the burning process, they would be much appreciated.
fyi u2 are a given, so don't think you're being smart there..

ride a white swan..

is my favourite t-rex song..
my mum loves t-rex
so things are calmer today. we fetched granny home from gloucester royal..she is well, drinking gin, commandeering and generally back at the helm.
i don't think i've ever been at the helm of anything..
she is well, and thanks for concerned phone calls etc.
i am still at a loss as to what happens on new years eve. i guess i want something vaguely new. so maybe a new place, or new people, or both, but i'm not sure how its gonna happen.
i watched the great escape today, and other than eddie's version, it was actually the first time i'd seen it. i know the comedy version pretty much off by heart, so this was new and exciting. i loved it...especially danny and poor colin.
brilliant
so, ok, i know i don't have that many regular commentors these days, but i am about to spend a day or two making some cds for a friend who is entirely uneducated in music history, and i would like any suggestions of bands or singers who in a collection of music representing somethings of the last forty or fifty years, cannot be overlooked...go crazy..
i also watched goodnight mister tom today, with inspector morse in it, and i was struck by what a bizarre concept the evacuation of children is. i also wept..like, properly cried. its been a while.
i also heard from cate, yesterday..!! she made it to south africa, in case any of you were still left wondering if she remained stranded in seattle....she made it, and got my present...hurrah!!!!!! i'm off to make real irish coffees now, in the fun proper glasses and all...and have a cigarette....its that strange weather round here tonight though, where its almost too cold to smoke...now i know this sounds about as stupid an idea as it being too cold to snow, but believe me, there's no evidence for it but it is scientific fact..sorry once more for a dull post, but being as i am in a house with broadband and a lovely laptop, it would be rude not to..x

none for the usual..

well what a to-do..
we've had a bit more than your average turkey, mince pies and what-not in our house today..my grandmother, not to be outdone by the lord jesus and his birthday, had some sort of bizarre attack of something in the late morning, and later the doctor came round, followed by hospital people, and now she's gone in there for the night..madness i tell you...you don't realise how routined your christmas day has become until things happen that change it and as soon as that happens it doesn't feel like christmas anymore...we're ok now, and the two ronnies are on tv so its all gonna be alright...kind of a wierd scary day though..made me think, as i realised that she had in fact lost a fair amount of counsciousness and had kind of stopped breathing, that i didn't want her to die without us liking each other a bit more than we do, cos we don't really, very much, and that's horrid. an old man collapsed in church this morning too, we thought he had died but he hadn't but i was praying in tongues before i knew it, which isn't easy in a catholic church, and the thought wa crossing my mind of, if it came to it, would i actually walk over there in front of 400 people and command him to live in the name of jesus...!?! the rest would have been ministering the last rights and praying for his safe passage through pergatory, and i figured i may well have been the only person there to march over there and pray the unthinkable. that was odd enough, without the same thoughts then running through my head sitting in the lounge on my second gin and it of the day, wondering which of the parcels for me would have a douglas coupland book in it...
i got my bag though....green corduroy with daisies and weeds on it...its so pretty..so that was good. it has actually been surprisingly fun, given everything..especially hearing from cate, getting a lush new jacket, giving my family presents that made them cry!! (in a good way..i think..!?) getting to pray with my family...listening to the jcb song a lot, and anticipating seeing my friends over the next couple of days who i love and who love me...and the bubble and squeak of tomorrow morning..and my new green earrings from my grandad and perfume and slippers and two yes two radios....what joy...sadie will be fine, we are quite sure of that...poor grandad though, her being in gloucester royal..it means we get to give him all the sweets and whiskeys and chocolates and cake and stuff that he wants though this evening, cos she's not here to tell him off! right the two ronnies have been spurned in favour of blogger, which cannot be right, i'm off to catch the end...its goodnight from me, and well, love you and happy christmas...!

all apologies..

so i guess i could do the sneaky back-dating-blogger thing..
but i think that would give too much undue attention to the last few weeks..
its been good, but not that good...!
went to cardiff...sold some drums, stayed with ben and jules, had some snow, watched harry potter, hung out with my sister, laughed a lot, saw the pienaars, discovered brandy in coffee and got very cold. and was denied a trip to the winter wonderland. loved cardiff.
came back to manchester. loved it. left again, went to lincoln, sold some more drums, worked the longest three days i've ever worked, drank beer and came back again.
loved manchester. going away is good but coming back, as they say, is better.
have been spending a good amount of time at the christmas markets, have been spending a better amount of time in my house, which now although less populated, feels more chilled and more pray-in-able.
and next week i'm going home for christmas. i'm excited about that.
before then, i want to see sal, see t and a, have my last day at my job, find another job, watch the polar express in 3d at the movies, make some fun thing to go on the wall in our kitchen, sing more carols, make tiffin, make more soup, see halen dc, get a massage, laugh, take photos at the christmas market..
i'll check in with you on thursday upon my departure for the holidays to see how many i have achieved
sorry that after such a pause this is such a shit post. i'm tired,
many loves to you all
cate if you're there i miss you!