i miss this..

internet i mean. i hate having to scramble round for any given opportunity to get a hold of some. and when i do its almost invariably when i feel i have nothing to blog. but i'm learning from sal that virtually everything is bloggable, so here goes..
i am living at heald place. this is wierd,but good. wierd because my friends used to live there, in a time wheni lived down the road...a time that i thought was more or less done for good. turns out it was less done. but good because the room used to belong to emma cowan and its lovely. and now partly green. and the people living there are really nice and it just feels like a nice place to be with them or on my own and both are good. last night i accidentally slept for about 10 hours. haven't done that in a very long time.
work is still good. the people in my office are hilarious, and the accents mean i spend most of the time feeling like i'm watching dinnerladies or something equally northern.
tonight is my first friday night back here and instead of going out and being young i have come to blair road to see ben and watto and eat food.
garden state is on now in the background. i'm a bit concerned i may have over-watched it, it seems a bit lost on me.
oh no wait..there it is....don't tease me about my hobbies, i don't tease you about being an asshole...yeah, still funny...

been talking about work a lot tonight. why to work, what to work as or for..i'm finding it really hard to figure this stuff out just now. i need to get some space tomorrow i think and buy a notebook. here is good but sometimes a girl just needs a pen and a new jotter. here, you see, there are people that know what they do, they love it they're good at it. their work is a part of who they are as oppose to an aside that passes the time and pays the rent. and while its kind of hard to be around those people, just because jealousy and feeling small can creep in, its also exactly what i need. its pushing me to think about it all again. and so i am grateful for it and to them. i love watching my friends give so much of their time and energy and love to their jobs. i think i just don't get it for my own part. yet.
the winter is coming. the rain has arrived. its the kind of all-day-long rain too, that makes you feel like it'll be wet all the time from now on, til may or something.
i think tomorrow i'm going to go to the northern quarter and find me some coffee. notepad in hand. or maybe a book to read. or both.
yes i think i better had.
btw ben is about to make a blog. be nice to him.