after a wonderful, peaceful treat of an evening (i got taken to room for a late supper with two of my favourite people..its my favourite place..and i ate what i think is the best thing they make...you can't argue with a night like that, can you...?!) i arrived home, yawned my way through -today in parliament- my nightly radio four ritual, and then turned, as i have so many times before, to the 70's psalms. the last couple of weeks' bout of not sleeping has somehow not involved me remembering the 70's psalms' previous success at helping me to regain some sort of internal balance, and thereby enabling sleep...how i could have forgotten about them, i'm not sure...thanks to a helpful textual reminder or two throughout the evening, though, i found myself once more at this...
(its a different version than i would normally prefer, but in the heap of books that lives by my bed, the message was the only good book available..)
pslam 77..
1 I yell out to my God, I yell with all my might, I yell at the top of my lungs. He listens. 2-6 I found myself in trouble and went looking for my Lord; my life was an open wound that wouldn't heal. When friends said, "Everything will turn out all right," I didn't believe a word they said. I remember God—and shake my head. I bow my head—then wring my hands. I'm awake all night—not a wink of sleep; I can't even say what's bothering me. I go over the days one by one, I ponder the years gone by. I strum my lute all through the night, wondering how to get my life together. 7-10 Will the Lord walk off and leave us for good? Will he never smile again? Is his love worn threadbare? Has his salvation promise burned out? Has God forgotten his manners? Has he angrily stalked off and left us? "Just my luck," I said. "The High God goes out of business just the moment I need him." 11-12 Once again I'll go over what God has done, lay out on the table the ancient wonders; I'll ponder all the things you've accomplished, and give a long, loving look at your acts. 13-15 O God! Your way is holy! No god is great like God! You're the God who makes things happen; you showed everyone what you can do— You pulled your people out of the worst kind of trouble, rescued the children of Jacob and Joseph. 16-19 Ocean saw you in action, God, saw you and trembled with fear; Deep Ocean was scared to death. Clouds belched buckets of rain, Sky exploded with thunder, your arrows flashing this way and that. From Whirlwind came your thundering voice, Lightning exposed the world, Earth reeled and rocked. You strode right through Ocean, walked straight through roaring Ocean, but nobody saw you come or go. 20 Hidden in the hands of Moses and Aaron, You led your people like a flock of sheep.
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